impRAWvise 

Times of change activate our nervous system on a constant basis, especially when it comes to a constant shift of ones inner / outer life, so to speak, or when it comes to some significant changes to ones day to day life and lifestyle, and in the long run, it can for sure lead to a sense of disconnect, distrust and just a lack of that inner feeling of safety and security that we all need in order to be able to live our lives truly and fully. I personally noticed, not just this year but also over the years, especially during those times of extended changes, that is does become harder for my nervous system to get back to a state of balance and flow, especially since my window of tolerance, which I am constantly working on and working with, is quit rigid at times, and it make the whole process even harder to digest and integrate. When I fall out of my emotional window of tolerance (meaning mostly, out of my safe space where I can process a certain range of emotional charge of various intensities), its hard to get back in touch with myself at times, just because I tend to push so hard on myself, and its just abut the last thing that I could possible need at that point. Maybe you have noticed too, that there are moments in your own life, when you know, intuitively, that you should be taking things slowly, but still find yourself pushing harder that ever and wondering why doesn’t it all work our after all?

Well, the thing is, that we can all get disconnected from time to time, and for sure, its not a realistic expectation to think that we can actually do it all and do it all perfectly, all of the time, sometimes we just need to rest and regroup. We might need to set our own inner homes in order first before we manage to address the outside world and its manifestations of chaos that might be at some point emerging into our lives. But, in fact, it is ok, we are only human, and we are designed to experience disconfort and pain at certain times, in order to not settle for less, in order to seek to adapt and grow, evolve, on a constant basis. Still there is a point, at which it might turn into something pathological, when the body keeps the score, and it (the thing that we are doing and pushing harder than it needs to be pushed) is no longer serving us. Perhaps, at some point, it is a good idea to just take break, take a deep breath (I now, especially when we are tired and wired, its so hard to stop what we are doing and reassess, but trust me, its totally worth it) and get to see the actual greater picture. Sometimes putting things in perspective is all than we need in order to regain our forces back and tap into the solutions that we were searching for and are truly and fully serving us as individuals as well as our greater purpose on this planet Earth. Some other times, it might just take a while for things to fall into place after they initially seem and feel like they might be falling apart, but hang on to it, trust the process and enjoy the journey as it may unfold. For me personally, an interesting concept with which I have struggled a lot over the years is this simple but yet profound ideea of being, feeling, embracing one’s home. Be in a physical space as well as a mental and emotional place to get to in order to recharge and regroup.

I have learned a lot about this in therapy over the years, as well and from practical experience, and since I fist left my first home, meaning, my childhood home at 15 years old, it has been a struggle to get that connection back. There have been times when I felt like I no longer belong to any of the places at all, be them at home, renting or visiting, but, also with times things have settled and as I got to understand myself better, and actively work on this concept, I have also experience wonderful mind shifts and shifts of perception that are not only helping me tremendously in times of change, but also help me stay grounded on a day to day basis. For me, this idea of home, other that being a physical place, which of course, it still represents up to this day and I am looking forward to having a good connection with the place where I am leaving at for each stage of my life, there is also more to it then just that. I try to focus now, more on the actual settlement of routines, habits and activities, ideas and practices that get me this feeling and cultivate them on a regular basis so that I do get that constant flow of grounding and comfy, cozy energy and vibes. I am very grateful for all the progress that I made in therapy, simply because it does help a lot to be able to not only see what is there left to be worked upon, but also what progress has already been made so far. Therefore I strongly encourage you today to take a small break from all the mental struggle of the “what needs to be done” and reflect upon what have you actually done already that deserves to be recognised, that you are really proud of yourself for turning it into reality. And then just take a deep breath and say “thank you” to yourself for showing up and doing the work, you deserve it and you are truly and fully absolutely amazing. Keep up the great work!