impRAWvise 

I am done. I am literally and metaphorically and in all ways done with dating for this year. After contemplating why is everything so hard, complicated and out of sync, I have decided that instead of blaming others for not being or not showing up the way I expected them to, perhaps, especially since I keep attracting the same old patterns and contexts that bring no value into my life, I will just set a conscious intention to let it go for a while, more specifically for the next 3 months until the end of the year. That should be enough time to get back in touch with myself and my own values and beliefs and what actually works for me and then I can reconsider if I want to get back out there, or I just simply need more time for myself. And that is ok, either way. Last year I have also done this and at the beginning of this year, and at that time it was mostly because of health reasons (its fascinating how our own health and wellbeing or lack of it, can be a great indicator of what needs to be done and prioritised at a specific moment in time and space), now I am simply doing it because it feels right. No one else knows what’s best for you when you are an adult, so you just have to make that conscious choice for yourself and allow it to unfold. The best insights come from taking a moment to simply ask ourselves: is this what I really want or how I want my life to look like on a daily basis? Or perhaps could it be different? More meaningful, more peaceful, more in sync with my own values and true self.

No one deserves to struggle in order to make something work because at the end of the day is it really worth it? Probably not. Sure, a conscious and intentional relationship demands work, implication from both sides and mutual love and respect, but until we get there, it might be wiser and better to just filter out what is not right for us, and if it is not the right moment to be dating, simply just take a break, put things on hold for a while, and work on what makes sense and needs to be prioritised at that specific moment in our lives. I mean sure, dating is fun and playful and all kinds of good stuff can happen as well, especially in the honeymoon phase but then, as you start to step into some sort of attachment to the other person and sometimes, its just natural for things to go this way, some other times its also natural, but more on a hormonal basis, if you know what I mean, and yes hormones are cute and fun, but not reliable when deciding on the right partner for yourself, especially in the early stages of getting to know someone. But, then, there is still hope out there, when you feel like you have lost yourself in the reels exchange and meaningless interactions, perhaps it is time to just a break, set some proper boundaries and let go of trying so hard to make it work. Perhaps it was never meant to be, maybe it was just a one time encounter, or a short term encounter and that is ok, let it go and focus on yourself, because you and only you can decide what’s best for your own good.

Its also ok for things to not work out, or to not work out the way we expect them too, sometimes its bad timing, but most of the times its simply not meant to be, and that is perfectly fine. Take a break, reassess, get back to yourself and what matters most to you and when you are ready you can then start dating again, its absolutely ok to sometimes feel overwhelmed by all those interactions that keep floating around with no specific direction or intention. Sure, we do not want to be pressured or to put pressure on the other person, but its necessary to get clarity when it comes to the context of the interaction, for myself personally I use a simple classification: its either friendly vibes, basically friend zone or the other options would be the romantic or dating zone. Either way, it’s absolutely ok, have faith in your own intuition and just give yourself time to heal. When you are ready, you will know, but until then, especially when you see that you keep attracting the same pattern (that is not serving you) over and over again, its definitely time to take a deep breath and let go. No matter what you choose or in what stage you currently find yourself into, just know that you are amazing, your are enough and you certainly do not need to change in order for someone to like you or even see you. As a matter of fact the only sustainable and the most meaningful change that we can do in life, is the one that we do for our own good and for our own wellbeing and health, and that is the one that makes most sense for us as unique and amazing, divine beings living this sometimes challenging but also very rewarding life on planet Earth.